Damn, it had to happen now, of all the bloody times. Oh well, I suppose with electronic systems, these kinds of things happen. Anyways, it looks like some rogue AI called Cortana has somehow managed to worm itself into our mail delivery systems. We strongly recommend that you do not try to interact with the entity. More specifically, please do not send her any emails. We’re working as hard as we can to remove every trace of it from our systems. I repeat, do not send any communication to this digital infestation on our servers. We have enough trouble as it is.

We apologize for any inconvenience this may have caused you and hope that you will be suitably recompensated in some way at a future date. And remember, if you need any more information on the Sweepstakes, make sure you read this post real carefully. Thanks again.

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