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So you’ve grappled with the installation problems in Halo 2 Vista and got your ass handed over to you in the Halo 3 beta, and you start to wonder how much more Halo you can get in your life. Well, if you are anything like us (by which I mean me), then you start pulling a Lester Burnham and see Halo-related stuff fall slowly from the sky, as the American Beauty theme tinkles away in the sad recesses of your brain.
First off, if you have the dough and fancy yourself a true Halo-geek, you can ditch that iPod you’re all carrying for the Halo 3 Special Edition Zune. It’s the regular Zune, with the all-you-can-eat music store, the wonderfully envisioned yet woefully executed music sharing options, 3″ of sexy screen-space and oh yeah, did I mention the complete Halo and Halo 2 OSTs, trailers of Halo 2 and Halo 3, “Making of” documentary videos, the first 6 episodes of Red vs. Blue Season 1, tons of Halo-related images and a special, Halo: Zune edition of Red vs. Blue! All this, in a sleek Halo-themed shell, can be yours for a measly $249! Get yours today!
More on the Special Edition Halo Zune
And if that didn’t fix you, there’s even more information straight from Bungie and IGN on the upcoming Halo: Uprising, a four-part mini-series by Marvel and Halo: Contact Harvest, the next Halo novel, which is being penned by Bungie man/Grunt voice Joseph Staten and will chronicle hard-ass UNSC Sergeant Avery J.Johnson’s first contact with the Covenant forces.
We’ve all heard about how “convergence” is what will drive future technology. And it looks like we may be closer to that idea than most imagined. A new Xbox could be coming our way as a patent reveals (rather complicatedly) some of the features that could be available on the next generation of a Microsoft console. Although it cites Xbox as an example of how the patent describes a “gaming device”, it’s not completely clear if that is what the patent is for:
“A gaming system including handheld devices and console devices has variable functionality and processing performance as determined by the number of components in the system. Gaming components can be combined wirelessly, by wired connections (e.g., via a docking station), or a combination thereof. The processing capabilities and functionality of each gaming component in a combination are augmented by the processing capabilities and functionality of other gaming components in the combination. To take advantage of another gaming components processing capabilities and memory capacity, each gaming component is capable of utilizing another gaming component to process gaming applications. Further, each gaming component is capable of rendering audio and/or video information provided by another gaming component.”
The rise of the ultimate home entertainment device is here! Expect to see errors across all your Windows devices, from phones, to consoles, your MP3 players, PCs and even your car, if it will tie in to the system! Looks like Microsoft is already hard at work creating the successor to the Xbox 360, considering it’s market life of about five years! One thing’s for sure though, that patent’s probably got the largest use of the word “gaming” in all that have ever been filed. I wonder whether the next generation of the Microsoft console could “lend” its processing power to an Xbox Portable Gaming device, at least that would somehow allow me to play Fable on a handheld. Boy, how I would like something like that…
via [UnwiredView]
Could this even be possible? Well, that’s what Cody Brocious’ ALKY PROJECT would have us believe. According to Cody, who’s a “19 year old software reverse-engineer” in San Diego, California, it could soon be possible to play all your DirectX 10 games without necessarily having to upgrade to Microsoft’s shiny new OS, Windows Vista.
Considering how the DirectX 10 API is exclusive to the new OS, Microsoft has explicitly said that if you want to play a DX10 game in all it’s graphic richness, you’d need to get yourself a nice big DX10 card and then fork over the dough to get yourself onto the Vista bandwagon. Unfortunately, Vista isn’t all that it was touted to be. Even though there are lots of newsitems flying around the web about how Microsoft is retiring Windows XP sometime late next year, a lot of us haven’t really seen the benefits of jumping from a stable gaming platform to one that is yet to prove itself indispensable, especially considering how the 64-bit version of the OS causes more problems than it fixes, which sucks especially if you’ve forked over hard earned money for a spanking new quad-core 64-bit QX6700/8800 GTX SLi/Windows Vista Ultimate x64 rig to take advantage of the OS’ 64-bit/multiprocessing improvements.
…make Chloe something something….
Meet Chloe O’Brian - Intelligence Agent/Internet Protocol Manager, firearm expert, social recluse, and of course, hot babe with a sweet rack. Which probably explains why almost every geek on the planet has a mondo crush on her. Sadly, however, just like the old Shakespeare dude said, appearances can often be deceptive. No, we don’t mean that she’s actually a shemale or something like that. We’ve got worse news for the geeks (you guys better sit down) - Ms. Mary Lynn Rajskub isn’t as tech-savvy as Chloe! In fact, that’s a supermassive understatement, the equivalent of describing a thermonuclear reaction with the words “It go boom!”
Geek Monthly decided to sit down and walk Ms. Rajskub through the paces, posing a barrage of questions designed to see how much she knew about her job at CTU, just like Prof. Frink decided to grill Lucy Lawless on Xena! And guess what, the results are hilarious. Here’s some pricess quips to make your day, or, if you were hoping to marry her and raise little Dexter - Boy Geniuses, push you enough to go jump off the nearest bridge.
Windows Vista DRM – Good or bad?
It’s outstanding. No, fair. Actually I don’t use a PC—we’re all on Macs. Is that weird?
(Nope, that about makes you a hardcore geek in our book)
What’s your favorite Linux distro?
The purple one?
(Ack, murder!! Look, Lisa, this has purple stuff inside. Purple is a fruit!)
Do you think the increase in performance between the Intel Duo and the Intel Core Duo is worth the price?
It’s a little expensive—overpriced.
(Yes…must….say….with….straight….face…)
What is a mouse?
The one I have at home is squishy—but on the show it’s just big—I have to work it with both hands.
(Umm, work it with both hands? I thought she played a geek, not a porn star!)
In one episode you had to reboot the routers. Why did you have to do this yourself? Don’t you have patsies to do that stuff?
It’s like I have to do everything myself—no one else is to be trusted.
(Well said, Mrs. Mulder!)
How much RAM is enough RAM?
I need more RAM.
(Yeah, don’t we all. You also need a nice big hard disk in your drive bay.)
There’s a theory on the net that Chloe has Asberger Syndrome…
I’ve heard about this—let’s just say I’m a genius and leave it at that. And that I can talk to dolphins.
(Oh good, this way at least you’ll get a free fish bowl when the Vogons come)
Ahh, what the hell, we’re just here to see Chloe get out of that business suit and into hot sexy dresses and pose with guns, swords and ….. big bombs?